New Look Jumper Dress (in the sale for £5!)
Lily Faux Leather Metallic Heel Ankle Boot [update – no longer available] c/o 4th & Reckless
When you look back on your teenage years you probably just think of the fun and jovial memories I mean they are a far cry from your 9-5 day job and all the ‘adult’ responsibilities, after all you could be young and reckless. True but if you remember back they were also some of the hardest years you’ve gone through. Your body, views and the world all changing and developing at a faster pace than is possible to keep up with. Huge dramas that now seem meaningless were detrimental to your day, week or event month, they could ruin friendships and they could easily make you feel like your world was crumbiling around you. I wanted to write a letter to my teenage self so that if I could let 13, 16 or even 18 year old me know it’s a bumpy road but its a journey to be treasured.
Dear 13 year Kenzie
Congratulations on becoming a teenager, it’s about to get a bit weird from here on in and in 10 years from now at 23 you will struggle to remember exactly what it was to be 13. MSN is huge, that is groundbreaking and plugging in your internet by your phone line wont last forever and Sims will be a past time you wish you had time for. Odd huh well don’t worry though being able to chat to anyone at anytime and anywhere is easier than ever and social media will in 10 years be the world that consumes us all so just be careful not to get too sucked in. It’s almost the time where you opt to wear makeup and become a little uncomfortable with your body and looks, that is totally OK but if you could please not make your eyebrows almost non existent, future you would be grateful as she’s had to get them tattooed thanks to your cleave ideas and trying to keep up with trends. That orange dream matte mousse is also terrible and if you do decide to still go ahead and not listen because of course you know best then please blend it into your jawline in years to come you will write about beauty and know it was a huge makeup mishap.
Dear 16 Kenzie
Wow what a 3 years it has been, you’ve had your first real relationship and it’s left you in a bad place. These will be your darkest days and I know nothing I nor anyone would say could convince you that right now you have any worth in this world. You will get through it I promise though the tunnel is dark and your mind is struggling to process such adult and complex problems that an escape route is hard to find. You here will become the epitome of young and reckless and will almost alienate all the people who care about you. But your upcoming girls holiday will change everything. The trust mum and dad in-still in you is pivotal and finding that escape route will literally save your life . You will go with your friends end up somehow meeting the love of your life, this will make every day and year from here on in different to what your path could have been. Word of warning though, fishbowls that taste of medicine will make you sick and you will be bold and think parting in the street in a leotard is cool! You also right now have no body worries which is amazing try and keep it that way and take care of yourself the world you grow up in is consumed by media and image and it is a hard thing to block out.
Dear 18 year old Kenzie
5 years have passed an it has become even more intense, you can drive and you got into university on your birthday a huge feat as the year before you had failed all exams even after a retake and endless effort, you would not have though this possible. It’s OK though you can accept being dyslexic it is not there to make you less able it is only a hurdle and you will learn that being able to get over that hurdle is a lot more rewarding. You’ve traveled up and down the country for the last year and a bit and you’ve managed to keep a long distance relationship going strong, I told you that holiday would change everything and defiantly for good, I am glad you finally let your guard down. It is time to pack up your life and take those big adult steps and head off to Sheffield to enjoy university and please do enjoy it. It will go past so quickly and you will spend everyday wishing you could still have an afternoon nap, drink 4 days in a row and eat junk and have no one judge you not even yourself. If I say one thing it is that you will here carve the opportunities that have got you to today, you will travel to amazing places and that little old social media world will be your outlet, you will work with and meet amazing people and you will have a unique platform to express yourself and it will create opportunities you never thought possible. Just be bold, brave and take it with both hands.
This world will not come without challenges and your health will hold you back you have a few tough years ahead but if you take it with a pinch of salt it will be just one of those things after all is done. You will continue to be a worrier a trait you’ve now become very familiar with and you must not let this anxiety rule you, though sometimes I know giving into it is the only way. All I can say is you will finish university with a fantastic degree, surround by new and some old faces who have supported you along the way, the dramas of the past are gone and your friends will grow up too, I mean some are married and have kids now. You have neither yet, don’t worry or panic yourself too much. You do own a house though and at 23 you will be proud of how far you’ve come in those 10 years, 7 of them spent with that guy you happened to meet on that girls holiday.
A whirlwind but one that has got me to where I am now, I am proud but sad a little too I guess. All the little experiences make you who you are but the realisation of things that could have been or were not meant to be can make you think of how things could have planned out. It’s hard not to dwell on some things but I am genuinely so thankful for where I am right now every hurdle, opportunity take or lost is how it was meant to be and only I can change today, tomorrow or my future.
If you could give your teenage self any advice what would it be?